February 2010

Dana DeArmond Website Review

by The Devil (admin)

Dana is too young to have saggy titties.

Dana is too young to have saggy titties.

The site: danadearmond.com

The price:$19.95 per month

The verdict: Pretty good stuff if Dana floats your boat. Incredibly hot brunettes who eat pussy generally do the trick for me. 8 out of 10.

[rating:8/10] (8/10)

To join, click here:www.danadearmond.com

Hey — I remember this Dana DeArmond freak. She’s that smoking hot chick that was some sort of MySpace sensation before she got into bondage porn (note: MySpace was a social website a long, long time ago. You can read about it in history books. It was sort of like FaceBook if FaceBook were made by the same company that made the Bedazzler, and if it were overrun and controlled by 13-16 year olds).

Anyhoo — here she is at DanaDearmond.com. Titties and pussy are apparently persona non grata on MySpace, but here on her own site she can make up for lost time by showing us the inner hole of her vagina, as well as how nicely her tongue fits into the vaginas of other female humans.

She also documents just about everything on her site, either in photos or videos. There’s a wide variety of styles too — ranging from grainy, web cam like material, to very high quality, artsy shit. That’s good, because I get bored with just one type of video, and at a place like DanDDearmond my boner won’t lose interest.

$19.95 will get you Dana DeArmond — and many two-tittied friends — for an entire month. There are other plans as well — the longer you join for, the cheaper it is. I’d make a suggestion as to which you should buy, but I’m a fucking pornographer, not a financial advisor. Christ, just flip your hog out and pick one already.

Pretty good stuff if Dana floats your boat. Incredibly hot brunettes who eat pussy generally do the trick for me.

8 out of 10

Visit DanaDeArmond.com

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Fetish Muse Website Review

by The Devil (admin)

Ack Ack Ack.

Ack Ack Ack.

The site: fetishmuse.com

The price:$19.95 per month

The verdict: $20 will get you a monthly to this here Fetish Muse, which is not too bad if you can dig only photos of an international fetish sensation. Not for me, but hey — knock yourself out 6 out of 10.

[rating:6/10] (6/10)

To join, click here:www.fetishmuse.com

How much do you shitheads want to believe that I’ve actually fucked a bald bitch? Fuckin’ A right I have! I fucked her hard, too. Everything was nearly the same as fucking a haired chick, except the cleanup from when I came on her head was predictably easier for her, and for some reason she shouted, “Who loves ya, baby!” when she had an orgasm.

FetishMuse.com site is patrolled by something called a Kummimonster. A Kummimonster is apparently a bald, half Irish, half Korean fetish model. Actually — she’s not as bad as it sounds…except for the bald part. But she does wear a lot of crazy wigs from time to time as she get tied up and has objects shoved into her cunt.

Here’s the real downer — no videos on FetishMuse. There are tens of thousands of artsy, high quality fetish photos — most of them really really fantastic — but no fancy moving pictures. I need some movement to get off. Pics are for cavemen.

$20 will get you a monthly to this here Fetish Muse, which is not too bad if you can dig only photos of an international fetish sensation. Not for me, but hey — knock yourself out.

6 out of 10

Visit FetishMuse.com

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