"Do I have something on my face?"
Do you like tits? Of course you do. Tits are what makes the world go ’round. Big tits, medium tits, handful sized tits, small tits — but mostly big tits.
Wifey has herself a set of hangers that would choke a hippopotamus. She’s also a blue ribbon dick sucker. She could suck the calories out of a hot dog. If you’ve never visited Wifey’s World, your ass in in for a first rate treat!
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It's about to look like a crime scene up in that motherfucker.
It’s one thing for a chick to say, “Ohhh yeah, I like it in my ass.” It’s another thing (and by “another” I mean way fucking hotter) for her to say, “Yeah you dirty motherfucker. You like Mommy’s ass, don’t you. Stick that cock up in my ass further you piece of shit, you! FUCK ME ‘TIL THE COPS DRAG YOU OFF OF ME!!”
Anal Destruction has the latter sort of chicks.
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Phhhhrrrrrtttttt!!!! Ahhhhhhhh...
Have you guys and gals ever heard of Taylor Bow? If not, you’re missing out on hours of home made pornographic glee. Taylor Bow is one of the best ever home made, boyfriend and girlfriend, jilted lover, fuck me on film bonanzas that you will find out there in Internet-land.
Confession: I have beat off to Taylor Bow more times than you have beat off. Ever. Period.
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Well, then...give it up, Bitch!
One of the most underrated things in all of sex is a good old Handy J. I once had a co-worker say to me that if a chick is going to give him a hand job, and only a hand job, he’ll pass, “because I can do that myself.”
You know what I said to him? ”Fuck you.” That’s what I said to him. His statement is, to this day, the most ridiculous thing that I have ever heard come out of anyone else’s mouth. Sure, we all like to get our hogs into the foxhole, but getting a hand job from a chick is infinitely better than doing it yourself.
Why? Because I always know what my hand’s next move is going to be. Sometimes I even get in a rut and do the same shit, time after time. Right hand, left hand, cowboy, conventional, off hand ring finger in the butt – POW. Clean up and move on about my business.
With a little lady facing me, using both hands and rubbing that shit on her tits and such – there’s no comparison.
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"...aaaaand enter the black dick...stage left..."
Interracial porn. There are few things better on this Earth. Maybe Mexican food. Mexican food is pretty fucking delicious. Led Zeppelin was pretty god damned stellar too. Mexican food and Led Zeppelin are about it, though. Then, it’s Black Dicks, White Chicks.
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"Now you go on and remember to wipe completely next time, or you're gonna get it again!"
Everyone likes a good ass whipping, right? I know I sure do. Show me a chick getting her ass beaten to a crimson pulp, and I will show you a guy with a dick harder than gypsum.
The very best ass whipping site that has ever existed is Whipped Ass. It’s lesbian BDSM, for fuck’s sake! You will agree with me, or you will be punished.
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I would give up one of my testicles just to be allowed to slip the head of my boner into one of her socks.
I plan to kick the shit out of this week. Fuck this manic Monday cunt shit — I WILL FUCK YOU UP MONDAY! Tuesday, you’d better have clean underwear on, because I’m coming for your fat ass next!
Please support your local cock by checking out these stunningly beautiful women.
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Nom, nom, nom, nom...
It’s the end of another smut-filled week for me, so I want to go out with a bang. What better way to put my stamp on this week than to direct you to male strippers – sometimes wearing bear suits — getting sucked off by horny sluts.
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Shit won't be so funny once I get my hog up in your guts.
I had a chick ask me one time if I , “liked to watch?” What the fuck kind of question is that? That’s like asking, “Would you like me to stop hitting you in the face with the sharp end of this fucking claw hammer?”
Of course I like to watch. Everyone likes to watch. Never in the history of boners and slits has someone seen a couple of people fucking and said, “EWWWWWWW!!” and ran out of the room. Well, maybe in George Wendt’s house – but you know what I mean.
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You'd better get that mouth open...
Don’t you just love that nasty, almost mean look that super hot chicks give when they come up for air while sucking cock? You know – the one that says, “Yeah, that’s right motherfucker. I can suck your soul right through the end of this hog, so you’d better cum a fucking truckload all over my face or I will steal that fucking soul and leave your body an empty shell of bones and wasted dreams.”
You can find that exact look time and again at Amateur Allure – THE best amateur Bj site to ever exist.
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